Kelvin's Corner

...this small Chronic break

I was inspired to do this post because of a blog that I read a little while ago from a blogger that had reservations about a post they did earlier...

Now even though this is a comic strip, by no means am I making light of a very serious situation that affects millions of people all across the world. I don't want to do any links or name any names because I want to respect said person's privacy to a certain degree I guess. I know that this person frequents my little spot and will probably read this and I hope that they don't mind me doing it.

All of that was said to say this....

How many times have you taken advantage of even the simplest of things in your life?

Now I don't mean walking down the street and finding $20 bucks that some poor bastard dropped on the ground or having an orgasm so strong that you feel like you are having an out of body experience or calling the radio station and winning tickets to some event... Nah, I am talking about things even more basic than that. How about the simple fact that you can wake up every morning in your right mind. How about the simple fact that you CAN walk down the street to find $20 bucks or the fact that you CAN have an orgasm so strong you think you are standing 3 feet away watching yourself shiver and shake and yell OH GOD!! Or being able to use your fingers to repeatedly dial the always busy number to a radio station to win those tickets?

I know I may be bouncing around on this one but bear with me ya'll. What I am saying is that we should all take a moment out of our sometimes ( hell oftentimes) hectic lives to stop and send one up to the REAL Man upstairs for being able to do even the simplest of things.

**Imagine this.....and no its not the herb talking**

Image waking up one day and everything that you have grown accustomed to has been changed in some way. I mean everything. This whole thing that you have come to know as your life has been altered and not necessarily for the better. You have to depend upon someone else to do things that you normally would do without even thinking about it. I for one tried to do this and the shit scared the hell out of me. Not only because I am single and don't have a wife, but because I live alone and can't imagine anyone who would be willing to make a sacrifice so big that it would change their own lifestyle. All my family pretty much lives out of state and I am sure that someone would do it, but I mean that is a HUGE undertaking to assume someone would do for me.

Now DaKelzz is not about to get all Billy Graham-ish on ya'll but I do want you all to know that you only get one go around at this thing called LIFE and you should live every moment, breathe every breath like it may be your last.

*whew...had to get that off my chest*

Now on a lighter note...the second reason for this entry is to let that person whom I spoke about earlier know that the whole point of this Blogging thing is to express your opinions, views, rants, and whatever else is on your mind at that time and the need for apologizing for what you wrote is not needed. You are SUPPOSED to write what you feel, You are SUPPOSED to put that out there if you see fit at the time. Sure, people will read it and its exposed to the whole world, but its YOUR space to do with as you please. So no apologies needed for getting shit off your chest. And if whoever reads it doesn't like it for whatever reason....just refer them to the little grey box with the black X on it in the upper right hand corner to alleviate their disapproval....

I Gotta Say This......

The hell is up with me lately? I haven’t had a thing to write about over the last few days…..

So I guess I will write about a little experience I had on Monday of this week regarding supporting our own. Now I know this may be a topic of epic proportions here in the Blog world, but I want to give my 5..(yes, I said 5) cents on this matter.

Now I am all for supporting Black business in the neighborhood, but there are just a few things that I think Black business owners need to pay special attention to.

1. Pricing- This is at the top of my list simply because I think that it has gotten WAY outta hand in some spots that I frequent. I mean I know that the smaller neighborhood businesses may not get the same volume discounts on certain items that a larger chain may get but, c’mon!! Marking things up 3 and 4 times just to try and cover cost! Don’t you all know that is the fastest way to send us to the larger retail outlets?!?!

2. Business Hours- This is another one that ranks right up there with the pricing woes that Black business owners face. How can I put this and make it so that its not taken the wrong way……hhhmmmm, if your sign on the door clearly states that you open at 8 a.m. then that is when you need to open, not 9:15 not 11:06 not 2:30 but 8:00 dammit!! Some people have other shit to do and don’t have time to keep calling or coming by to see if your ass made it in yet. Jeezus Christ!!

3. Quality of Service- Now I could just link you guys to this post and you will see just what the hell I am talking about here. I realize that you are trying to cut costs and want to minimize your overhead cost as much as possible, but hiring ALL your family members (some of which you should probably question handling your money!) to work in the store may not be a good idea. Also hiring little Aquanetta from down the block also might not be such a smart move either. Not to say that hiring from within the neighborhood is always a bad idea, just ask for a reference or two before you hire said person.

4. Networking- Now I put this up here with the hopes that some business owner will read it and get a freakin’ clue. Now networking can be a good thing and also help your business as well. Case and point: I am in this Black owned business on Monday and am talking to the owner. I tell him that I do freelance IT work on the side and if he wanted me to, I could schedule a time with him to come in sit down and talk about what it would take to update some of his computer systems. As soon as I mentioned what my hourly rate was for doing something like that, dude immediately lost interest in what I was talking about!! I mean I can understand wanting a second, hell even a third price quote on something like that, but my fees are nominal compared to what some other folks charge as he shall soon see. I left my card and I am sure when and if he does decide to upgrade, he will be calling…*wink, wink*

5. Finally, just because you have a business in the neighborhood, that does not mean that people should automatically come to you for their purchases. I mean I am all for supporting Black business in the hood, but you have to meet us at least halfway on some things. The ones I mentioned here are only the beginning. I am gonna leave the comments section open for you guys to put anything that you feel needs to change in order for us to keep money in our own neighborhoods and stop making these retail giants even more wealthy….hhhmmm that just gave me an idea for my next post…heh, heh…..

Later ya’ll

Just another day, Living in the 'hood.........

Well its snowing like hell here in Chicago. I awoke this morning and looked out the window only to see that everything was blanketed in a fresh coat of snow. I would venture to say that we got at least 7 or 8 inches. And there is more to come so the weather reports say.

With all this in mind I knew that I needed to be outside shoveling so that it wouldn't be damn near impossible to get off the front porch come Monday morning to go to work. So I bundled myself up and made my way to the garage to get the snow shovel, when I realized that I was fresh out of salt to put down after the snow removal. So I hope in the car and go up to the local Home Depot to remedy this little predicament. Now I probably need to give you guys a little backgroud on this particular Home Depot...First off it sits in a very high traffic area and there's always a lot of people in there for some damn reason. I swear, I don't know what it is, but that HD is always jumping..LOL And there are a bunch of younger, high school kids presumably, working there....all I can say about them is..much needed attitude adjustments...I mean its like you are bothering them when you are trying to pay for your things....

Ghetto Cashier #1:( on the little phone near the register)...so yeah girl, then I told that nigga....

DaKelzz: Excuse me, are you open?

GC:..*rolling eyes and popping gum*...girl lemme call you back, somebody just came into my line...

..so she starts scanning the de-icer pellets

GC: $12.98

DaKelzz: (Handing her $13.00)..don't worry about the pennies..lol

GC: ...(fake smile)...Don't worry, I won't..

I mean, what the hell was that all about?!?! I tell you ...MUCH NEEDED attitude adjustments..LOL Its like, Damn, you do work here right? Ring me up then!!!

So anyway, I get back home and finish the snow removal and now I am back in the house all nice and toasty writing to you guys...:-)

....and that's weird cause I don't normally blog on Saturdays..

...my Venus

Since I am in this mood to talk about relationships, dating, breaking up I thought I would talk to you guys about my first crush.

Now granted there has always been some sort of attraction between me and the opposite sex that goes all the way back to my early grammar school years. The kind of playground infatuation that entices games such as Hide N’ Go Get, Catch a Girl Kiss A Girl and Spin the Bottle… for those that can remember back that far. LOL I can’t exactly remember the VERY first girl that I had a crush on since it does go back so far but I will tell you guys about a teenage crush I had back in the day.

I think that it had to have been maybe around 1988 or so and I was in my freshman year of high school. There was this girl named Emily Melton that I was just smitten over. I mean this girl was FINE!!! She had to be about 5’5 or 5’6, Redbone, nice shape, beautiful smile, long pretty black hair…to me she was my Venus. Now the tripped out part about all of this was the fact that her mom was my Biology teacher and during the time I had Biology she would always stop by her mom’s classroom and visit with her before class started, so I got to see her damn near everyday. Believe me ya’ll when I say this girl was the Truth, that’s exactly what I mean. Only one small problem, she dated the one of the captains of the football team and me being the skinny shy kid never helped. I would always make sure I got to class early enough to see her and her mom talking for those few minutes and I would see her in the hallways during passing periods. She was one of the “popular” girls and always had a bunch of friends/associates around her. I sort of think that she knew I had a crush on her because she would always sort of smile at me and wave a little bit when we passed each other in the hall. Now mind you she was a grade ahead of me and she was dating a senior so my chances of getting with her were in the negative numbers region somewhere.

We eventually began talking and speaking to each other on a more frequent basis, and soon became very good friends. We used to hang out sometimes at school, but I never really clicked with the “popular” kids because I was then and always will be true to myself and couldn’t stand to be around all those damn phonies. I even asked her once why she would want people like that in her circle and she told me that it just wasn’t in her to be mean to people and she tried to get along with everybody….I guess…lol

We remained friends until she graduated after my junior year and we eventually lost touch with each other. I later found out that her mother lived in my neighborhood and I would stop by every so often to see her while my Venus was away in college. We never got back in contact with each other after that and I never told her how I felt about her. Its been over 10 years and I can still remember it like it was yesterday. I wonder what she is doing now. If she is still in AL or has she moved to another state, gotten married, had some kids….will we ever cross paths again? Who knows? I just know one thing, if I ever run into her on the street for some strange reason, I will be sure I let her know that I had a serious crush on her back in the day and tell her she made my heart damn near skip a beat.

Comfort Levels...

I got inspired to do this post after reading the Vengeance post on BC page.

The Break Up

Man, I am sure we all can relate to this one. It’s a subject that is often talked about on many talk shows, reality shows, and hell even in the movies (i.e. Breakin All The Rules)

Anyone who has been in love knows that breaking up can truly be a hard thing to do sometimes. Not to omit the obvious reasons for this such as love, companionship, deep rooted emotions, but there are several other factors that come into play when that awful time comes. One of the main ones that jump out in my mind is the comfort level that tends to come when you have been with a person for so long. You all know what I am talking about. The comfort level that I am talking about is the one that allows you to be totally yourself around that other person. You know you can talk to them about ANYTHING and they won’t look at you like you are some kind of freak of nature. That comfort level that allows your mate to come in the bathroom with you when you are ‘pinching a loaf’...LOL And by the way, you KNOW that is true love when a mufucka can come in the bathroom with you when you are handling that business..ROFL!!

It can be hard to leave those comfort levels that sometimes take a while to establish. I think that is one of the main reasons breaking up can be so hard to do. Now different people handle breaking up in different ways. For some the initial shock of it can be devastating, so devastating that they want to end their own life, which I think is only an outcry for some other deep rooted psychological problems. I don’t know about you guys, but taking my own life because another person didn’t want to be with me?!?! WTF!! First of all I have a daughter to live for and I place her first in damn near everything I do so suicide is DEFINITELY not an option for me.

I think after the initial shock is absorbed, then comes the withdrawal symptoms. The regular routine that you have developed with that person is all of a sudden interrupted and it’s like you have to start finding shit to compensate for that adjustment to your regular pattern. The calling just to say “ I love you” all of a sudden stops. The little notes you are accustomed to finding in random places from said person all of a sudden stop showing up. The flowers at work on a damn Tuesday for no apparent reason, outta there. The having someone to curl up to on those Blockbuster nights seem to seize and desist…

*Excuse me ya’ll, I feel a tear welling up…*sniff, sniff*

But for real though, after the withdrawal symptoms subside and the realization that its really a done deal between you two, then comes the whole ritual of entering the dating scene again. Now this shit can be a trip. I personally consider myself a decent looking brother and meeting women has never really be a problem for me, but its always awkward when you meet a new person for the first time. Now me myself, I am very down to earth and straight forward on a lot of things so a lot of times my personality wins me kudos with women. I love to laugh and usually try to break the ice with something humorous. But the whole concept of getting to know a “new” person can be cumbersome to say the least. I mean it’s like starting from scratch and sometimes your expectations from that previous relationship tend to carry over and you start expecting this new person to be the same way that old person was with you. Which may or may not lead to problems.

I don’t know ya’ll…it’s a trip, the whole dating, and relationship thing. That’s why DaKelzz will more than likely be flying solo until that right person comes along to get me caught up in the rapture…LOL

…..I’m out…

Weekend Recap

What’s up Boys and Girls?,

Just wanted to give you guys a little recap of my long weekend.

Friday:

Not too much went on after work on Friday, just usual stuff. I tried to make it to the barbershop, but wasn’t successful thanks to Friday evening traffic and the fact that it was made worse because of construction in certain areas. Got home and mad dinner, which reminds me, I want to thank all of you who cared to contribute to the previous post asking for any good and quick recipes that could help a brotha save a little cash. LOL

**FYI…the Spicy Oven Fried Catfish is OFF THE HANDLE!!!**

Pretty much chilled and watched ESPN and movies the rest of the night.

Saturday:

Woke up bright and early (don’t ask me why) and made it to the Barber Shop to get a haircut. I got there and as usual on a Saturday, there was a full house. I try NOT to go on the weekends for this reason, but I managed to make it out in about an hour’s time. After the Barber Shop, I stopped by Target to pick up some miscellaneous things for the house. Surprisingly, my Target expedition wasn’t as bad as I thought it might be, maybe because I went early in the morning and a lot of people weren’t even up yet, don’t know. I got what I needed and left there. My buddy Dorian called me and told me about this little party he was having later on that night and I told him I would fall through for a little bit. Made it back home and hung around the house for a bit until the games came on. Which leads me to my next topic…..THE PLAYOFFS!!!

No real surprises here.

Philadelphia beat Minnesota…..knew it would happen, Minnesota is toooo suspect. And even though Terrel Owens didn’t play, McNabb is just unstoppable!!!

Atlanta just embarrassed St. Louis…I won’t even comment on that one…two words..Michael Vick!!

Pittsburgh beat the Jets…Actually this was the best game I saw all weekend. I can only say this….whatever that field goal kicker’s name was for the Jets…might need to start looking for a new job!! I mean what are the odds of missing two field goals back to back like that?!?! Oh well I wanted Pittsburgh to win it anyway!!

New England beat Indianapolis….No surprise here. Offense gets you the highlight reels and Defense wins championships….nuff said. I like Payton Manning, but if your defense is as lack luster as Indy’s was, Manning will never get a ring. Plain and simple.

After the football was over, I headed to the party. Nice little set, only thing was, there were waaaayyy too many dudes at the party. Don’t you hate that, when its not a good mixture of women to men and vice versa? I stayed for a little while, had a few drinks and left.

Sunday:

Not too much happening on Sunday, just chilled out at the house.

Monday:

Watched a bunch of older movies that all had some sort of “Black History” theme to them in honor of MLK’s birthday. I swear, if I have to turn on the TV again and see Mississippi Burning, I think I will scream!!! But it was cool I actually got some reading done on Monday. I finished White Butterfly (Walter Mosely) and I started reading A Little Yellow Dog (Walter Mosely).

All in all it was a pretty good relaxing weekend.

Good Recipes

Okay, okay...I know this isn't Cooking with Justin Wilson..(used to love that show by the way), but I just wanted to ask you guys to help me with one of my I.am.going.to.try.to.start.this.and.keep.it.up.the.whole.year type things...I absolutely refuse to say "New Year's Resolution"...LOL

One of those things was to try and save some cash by cooking at home instead of always eating out all the time. I actually did the math on the amount of money I wasted eating out last year and that shit will amaze you!!!

Example:

Average Lunch: @ $7.00

Average Work Week @ 5 Days

Average Weeks Worked per Year @ 45

Total Spent Eating Out @ $1600.00

....$$1600...per year just eating lunch at work!! That's crazy as hell!! in my honest opinion and those figures are just rough estimates. Don't count the outings outside of work, miscellaneous outings to ball games and what-not. I think it would be safe to say that in an entire year's worth of food consumption that wasn't cooked at home, but rather bought while outside the home, would be around 3 or 4 thousand dollars maybe!?!

So I am asking all of you to either email or post for others to see any good recipes you have for simple, fast, home cooked meals (that don't contain BACAN)..LOL
and see if we can get a pretty good list compiled. mmmkay?

...In other news..

What the HELL is this about!!

C'mon man...I mean seriously. I read the article and sympathize with his plight, but please man. Give him a chance to play in the NBA again? Why, just because he is Jayson Williams? Would my black ass get another chance at just a normal life if I shot my damn limo driver? HELL NAH!!! Maybe its just me, but I can't sympathize with you shooting a man in cold blood and then trying to cover the shit up. What I can understand is that he probably has legal fees out the ass and probably got shook after hearing about Ricky Williams and the 8 or 9 million he had to pay back to the NFL for reneging on his contract to smoke blunts and shit!! LOL

Well that's all for today folks...be sure to get at me with those recipes...brotha trying to work on that whole retirement at 50 thing and every penny saved helps!!

later ya'll

Answers to your questions

Althought I didn't recieve as many questions as I thought I might, I decided to go ahead and answer the ones I did recieve with today's entry.

Elle asked:

One question. When can a sista get Season Two? Just kidding. Kinda.

I know you love Chicago, but where would you go if given a choice of the whole world...and money wasn't and issue?

Your favorite Aesop fable?

Your favorite memory of your father?

What's your biggest phobia?

DaKelzz: Season two won't be out until the 25th....I'll let you know when I get it....

If I had to pick somewhere else to live outside of Chicago at this point in my life, I would have to say there are a couple places that stand out right away. New York, Atlanta, and maybe San Diego..I have never been to any of those places but have heard that they were all great cities to live in. Why not live abroad, you may ask? I am an American and I think that I am too "Americanized" to try and live someplace else right now. Not to say that is impossible, but just not willing to do that right now.

My favorite Aesop fable...good question and only the Ellester could come at me with this one...I would have to say that my most influential fable would be the one about the Miser and his gold. I am a very free hearted person and firmly believe in saving for a rainy day, but still believe in the old adage that you have to spend money to make money and that is something that I have learned to be very true in my coming of age. Nobody should gloat over what they have because you never know when it can be taken away.

My favorite memory of my father would be the time when I was like 8 or so and for Christmas we (my two sisters and I) got an Atari 2600 one year for Christmas. I remember the event so vividly because as no child does, we didn't actually go to sleep on Christmas Eve and heard him in the living room unboxing the game and playing it before we had a chance to open it on Christmas morning. I can still hear the Pac-Man theme music playing in the background!!LOL That was too funny and I can still remember it to this day!!

My biggest phobia...hhmmmm I would have to say that my biggest phobia is Atychiphobia, which I admit, I had to look up and it means a fear of failure. I have had this for pretty much all my life and have taught myself to always give it my best shot, no matter what I am doing. I think my parents sort of planted the seeds for this by placing the fear of God in me when it came to my grades in school. It was stressed upon us to not bring anything less than a B home on school assignments and report cards....its something that just never left and I am like that to this day. I always try to give everything I do my all because you never know if there will be a chance for a REDO...lol

Funkeediva asked:

What makes you happy Kelvin? :)

DaKelzz: I would have to say that since I don't get to see my daughter all that often since we live in different states, the time that I get to spend with her and watching her smile simply does it for me. That is why I was so upset in this post. To me it seems like I miss so many of the things that I know I can't go back and relive with her....the first day of school, her bringing home her first report card with straight A's, her first steps, etc. Now don't get me wrong I know I missed out on alot of those things but we still have a lot of good memories to look back on and laugh. Like the time I took her to DisneyWorld when she was 7. I think we BOTH had a fantastic time there because it was a first time for us both. We stayed like a week and Daddy is still paying for that trip..lol.

Sway asked:

What was your most memorable event from last year?

DaKelzz: 2004....aaahhhh what happened to it? There were so many things that happened last year that made me want to be extra observant in 2005. The things that stand out most in my head from 2004 were pretty much covered in this post.

Mary asked:

Why don't you want more kids and do you think you'll ever feel differently?

Do you get along with your daughter's mom?

DaKelzz: I don't think that I want more kids right now because I don't have a wife. I am not totally against another child. I personally think the world would be a better place if there were a Kelvin Jr. running around..:-) But that's just my opinion. I simply think that the difficult choices I had to make with Deja sort of put me in this mindstate that when and if I do have more children, I want them to grow up with both parents in the house. I think that is only fair to the child and since I wasn't able to do that with Deja, I want my next child to have that.

Deja's mother and I get along really well. I don't have any of the "baby momma drama" that I hear alot of my buddies dealing with. I admit, when I first came to Chicago, she was very salty with me and we didn't speak for a few months. I still made sure I sent money and tried to call as often as possible. After the first year or so, she finally came to the realization that I wasn't going to move back and that what I was here doing would be beneficial to Deja in the long run. She doesn't give me a hard time about alot of things (except Deja getting on an airplane) so I can't really trip too much....*thanks God for sending me a good baby momma*..LOL

UltraMag asked:

Where do you see yourself five years from now?

Good question, I was actually wondering when someone was gonna ask me something about where I would be in 5, 10, or 20 years. Since I will be turning the big 3-0 this summer and kissing my 20's good-bye I guess I need to move this plan I have to retire at 50 into gear. Currently I do IT/IS consulting on the side. I would like to expand my freelance business into something with maybe about 3 or 4 more employees and move more into a managerial role with that. And anyone that has worked in IT for more than 5 years can tell you...burnout happens really quickly in this field, so before that happens to moi, I would like to be away from it and financially secure enough to not have to worry about it. I also plan to expand on my real estate investments so that I will always have more assests than liabilities....Now my dream is to become at least 50% liquid....I know it may sound far fetched, but I know its possible....and of course I would love to be married and maybe another child, but we will have to see on that one....:-)

And I also want to thank

Shaunte, Sivad, and Keish for all your advice on the little situation with my credit. Just an update. The bill has been paid and the collection is scheduled to come off in maybe like a week or so..:-)

..am I just not that thought provking?

....I was gonna do a post today to answer any of the questions that I got from my last post, but hence that would be a very short entry, so I am gonna leave the floor open for all of those that didn't get a chance to ask questions before I do a post with the answers.....

Q & A

Okay, okay, I know my last couple of posts have been about the snow we have had here in Chicago over the last few days....but hell there isn't a whole lot else going on that's worth writing about. I will mention this one little thing though. I am sitting at work yesterday and my phone rings. It is my mortgage broker and he has been working with me on this investment property I am trying to close on....anyway he tells me that there is a collection on showing up on my credit file....

** An instantaneous look of concern drapes over my face**

Apparently, there was an outstanding cell phone account that was showing up there. I immediately get on the horn and start calling the credit bureaus to find out just what the hell is going on. Once I got the information regarding the account, I contacted that collection agency and paid the bill. I even managed to get them to fax me a letter clearly stating that the item was to be removed. I contacted Experian first and was completely not satisfied with the level of customer service I received. I even explained to them my dilemma and the sense of urgency surrounding it...all to no avail...useless I tell you.....useless. I explained that it was imperative that this blemish be removed ASAP due to the upcoming closing....all of this meant nothing to them. I tried to see if I could fax that same letter I received so they would have proof that the bill was in fact paid and the entry removed....this chick on the end of the phone was like "We can accept faxes"..WTF!?!?! is that about, somebody please tell me. I mean I know there are some shady, sheisty characters out there that would try to send in BOGUS letters just to see if they could get negative info removed, but c'mon I am DaKelzz!! lol

Anyway it ended up with me just having to wait and see when they are gonna decide to make the correction. But you best believe I will be on the phone with the collection agency until they do submit the correct info to those credit bureaus. And any of you all that have had bad credit, know that it ain't about shit...once you manage to get your shit straight you tend to want to keep it that way!! Feel me?

I thought that it may be a good time to do my own little Q & A session. I know that we are all just one big happy Blogging family and I am opening up the floor for any and all questions that you may have about DaKelzz...anything your little heart desires I will do my best to try and answer...

Happy Friday!!